When Miley Cyrus sticks her tongue out, She's Really Bitchin'!

Bitches like to stick their tongues out...

Woody Allen's son is really Frank Sinatra's bastard?

How coy. Mia Farrow is saying it's "possible" that the son she supposedly had with Woody Allen is Sinatra's.

"Ronan Farrow" does look like a gay Frank Sinatra. Or a metrosexual one. When you have a weak father banished from contact and a strong, strong mother...that's a recipe for sexual confusion.

The only time "Ronan Farrow" is in the news is when he's bad-mouthing his father, Woody Allen. He actually Tweeted (how brave) on Father's Day some sarcasm: "Happy Father's Day, or as they call it in my family, Happy Brother-in-Law's day."

Nobody really wants to interview this guy about the cushy high-paying no-real-work government jobs he's gotten through his Mia Farrow connections, or how he attends Hillary Clinton parties and rubs soft shoulders with all the other pretty boys who attend the power-dinners in Washington D.C., No, name-change Ronan (that's not what Woody named him) only gets press when he disses Woody. As in: "He's my father married to my sister. That makes me his son and his brother-in-law. That is such a moral transgression."

Snitty, silly and based on a minor legality. "Ronan" seems like the kind of guy who goes into a tizzy at Lord & Taylor because the designer label on the back of his 45$ necktie was sewed with nylon thread instead of cotton.

Yeah, technically Woody married his "sister." But also, technically, Woody never married Mia. So what does the bastard have to say about that? Does he walk around telling everyone he's a bastard?

"I cannot have a relationship with my father and be morally consistent...I lived with all these adopted children, so they are my family. To say Soon-Yi was not my sister is an insult to all adopted children."

Soon-Yi is not only adopted, but of a completely different race. The accusation that Woody's some maniac involved in incest is totally "off the chain," and it's been part of ignorant criticism about him for decades now; "He married his own daughter."

You might feel sorry for "Ronan Farrow," growing up with a choice of lunatics. Mia Farrow is nuts, and also an actress who can lie convincingly, and turn anyone against anyone. And Woody is a genius and there's plenty of selfishness and insanity that goes with genius. I read Mia's book. You certainly can sympathize with the plight of an intelligent, still-attractive (and vain) actress discovering that the guy she's had a long-term relationship with is taking nude pix of her 22 year-old (and not all that attractive) adopted daughter. Just what went on with their adopted daughter Dylan...is a whole different Rashoman.

In her book Mia didn't mention anything about an "open relationship" with Woody that would allow her to fuck Frank Sinatra. So is this an actress's invention or something she finally decided to reveal that wasn't suitable for the book?

It's a bit peculiar that she'd be saying that a 70-something Sinatra could father her child...and not be too concerned about how the widow Barbara Sinatra would take this.

The answer? According to Barbara, apparently channeling Yogi Berra, this is an example of "lies that aren't true."

How extra coy of Ronan to not confirm or deny who is father is. Is that his coquette way of having fun with the reporters flocking to find out more about his life? Or would Mom be angry if he said that he'd never heard her say a word about his paternity being in question and that she can sometimes be caught up in her own world of revenge or confusion?

Woody's wisely not taking the bait, and hoping that after all these years of relative quiet on the subject of his sleeping with a relative, that this brief flare of Farrow will fade away.

I did cover the Farrow-Allen court case, as a photographer, for a few days. There was quite a difference in how they arrived at court. Woody's limo pulled up at the front, and he walked the long, long gauntlet up the steps, somewhat shy and clearly in a state of nervous chagrin, but not hiding. No, he wasn't even wearing one of his idiotic hats. Mia? Her limo pulled into the side entrance of the court building, and she had a statue-like beauty to her, and a statue-like calm. You couldn't tell what was on her mind from her neutral expression...which didn't have much chance to change as she sauntered quickly by.

How nice, to read juicy gossip about people 50 and over, who actually contributed to the world despite their human failings, as opposed to the steady diet of shit about pop stars, rap morons and drug-abusing sports figures. What a small favor, to see a name from the past (when was the last time you saw a Mia Farrow movie) and a familiar current face (Woody actually does get photographed going to parties and events...probably dragged out by Soon-Yi). Woody sightings in NYC are not uncommon, most certainly in Central Park or within a 10 block radius of his apartment. But sightings of Woody alone...not so common. He does tend to be with Soon-Yi, the woman he's been married to for quite a while. That's either love...or the need of a bodyguard with a lot more punching power than he has.