A few words on ANDY ROONEY, who died November 4th, 2011

Ever notice that people tend to remember the day you were born, and not the day you died? Why is that?

Why is it people will say, "Hey, today would've been Andy Rooney's 103rd birthday." As if you could feed cake to a corpse. Isn't it more important to say "Hey, today, November 4th, Andy Rooney died?" After all, you were around when he died, not when he was born, right? And which was the more emotional and painful experience? Except for Andy Rooney's mother, it would be the death date.

Ever wonder what people would say about you, oh, three years after you died? Anything at all? Maybe "Remember the bushy eyebrows?" "There are no more curmudgeons." Nevermind, they said that when Bea Arthur died, too.

Sometimes, I think about Andy Rooney in the summer, when "60 Minutes" was in re-run. Did he have nice summers? Were they nice because he knew he didn't have to complain about something every seven days? When women think about "the curse," do they feel glad they weren't Andy Rooney, who was on this weird cycle of having to moan and groan EVERY seven days for most of the year? Did it get worse for him late in life when he perhaps had to whine and grimace AND remember to slip some protective pad into his underwear?

I wonder about these things.

They say the evil that men do lives after them, and the good is oft in turds with their bones. Something like that. Can anyone remember a good Andy Rooney line? If they can, does that mean it's evil, because it lived after him?

After November 4th, 2011, why didn't they just call the show "58 minutes," and leave the last two minute for a blank screen as a tribute? Sort of like a moment of silence? Would that be asking too much? I mean, aren't we sick of that tick-tick-tick noise throughout the show?

I wonder how many people still have a sense of wonder.

Andy Rooney made you wonder. First, he made you wonder how he got that job. Second, he made you more "aware" of things. You became aware of how easily most anything could get on your nerves. Especially him. Did you notice that? I did.

I share Andy Rooney's sense of wonder most every day. I question everything. Would it be in poor taste to raise money for Oscar Pistorious on Kickstarter? Does "election day" provoke a lot of Viagra jokes in Chinatown? Shouldn't they wipe the soundtrack to DVDs of "silent" movies? Why did I get a free flu shot yesterday via Obamacare when my name isn't Obama? Can you easily do this too, just come up with whimsical, annoying, deliberately querelous misconceptions on most anything and everything you see and hear?

I wonder about these things, on the day Andy Rooney died, November 4th. Do you?