EBAY FORGERS GO WILDER

The death of a celebrity is sad news, except to EBAY FORGERS. As soon as a celebrity dies, hundreds of signed items appear. How many of them are fakes? Nobody knows. Gene Wilder was not known to sign a lot of material. For years, fans got a form letter, along with the return of photos or collector cards, stating "he has a lot on his plate," and could not sign memorabilia. This was especially true of his last years when he was dealing with Alzheimer's Disease. And yet, hundreds of items appeared within hours of his death. The amount was easily triple, or quadruple the amount on George Carlin or Joan Rivers. This was a surprising "tribute." Gene's signature is not difficult to copy (compared to Bob Hope who could surprisingly tangle those seven letters). Some forgers make sure to hide imperfections by putting the signature on a baseball or some other odd-shaped item. "Oh, it might not look exactly like a signature on an authenticated book or photo, but...he was in a rush...and signing a baseball is awkward!" The profits on signed items are enormous. Take a ball, scrawl a signature, and make $250 or more. On the first day, the knee-jerk reaction to Gene's death had people buying signed items for $400 to $600 each, with sellers shrewdly doing "one-day buy it now" sales. Don't wait and study and compare signatures, "BUY IT NOW!"

Real? Fake? Happily, the more than 100 people who did pay $400 to $600 (the prices went down within a week) are probably content that if it's on EBAY it has to be REAL. They will show off the item to astonished friends and relatives, as if Gene actually signed it for them. Who knows, some WILL make that claim. Having an item authenticated costs money and, would you be surprised to know this, it doesn't guarantee authenticity. Rival companies often war with each other and call a forgery real or vice-versa. There was a big scandal over Muhammad Ali merchandise, when a previous company that owned licensing seemed to flood the market with items when he died. The current company began to send takedown requests, insisting that these items couldn't possibly be real. "They're real, we had a lot of back stock," the first company replied. Why people BUY autographs is a curious pastime. It's one thing to ask for an autograph in person, or even by mail. But to BUY one? What's it mean? What's it prove? As an investment, it's usually absurd. Wilder's signature is not likely to increase in value. Few celebrities ever do. Steve Allen once suggested that the only autographs worthy of collecting would be very famous political figures. A signature on a BASEBALL? A few years ago, a notorious EBAY seller used to offer nothing but autographed golf balls. What could be easier to forge? A golf ball is loaded with dimples and most anyone signing one is going to be scribbling and scratching and slipping and sliding. Every auction was headlined with the celebrity name, and one extra word: "FORENSICS!" Somehow, there was DNA on the golf ball? Never underestimate EBAY sellers for making up insane caveats or, as Judge Wapner used to say, "puffing." EBAY does suspend autograph dealers but the damage is done. I once stopped an auction on eBay for a celebrity friend. The item was a forgery. The seller was actually a dealer, outraged at having his expertise questioned. The item even had a date on it! I pointed out that the date of the alleged signing was two years BEFORE the movie the celebrity was in even came out. The movie had yet to be filmed! The forger had slipped up on making a 9 a 7. The dealer relented. The item was not sold on EBAY. Whether he sold it in his store, I have no idea. I also don't know what his stock was on autographed baseballs and golf balls.