Andre Previn, Dead. There but for Farrow...and several other abuses....

If memory serves well...Andre Previn was livid and red-as-a-lobster over how badly his ex-wife was treated by Woody Allen.

Imagine...somebody so LOW as to have an AFFAIR. Oh, that Woody Allen!

Oh, that ANDRE PREVIN.

Here's Andre in happy times with Mia Farrow.

Charming isn't he? He doesn't seem like a weasel.

And Mia, she looks pure as the driven snow here. Naive, adorable, not the type to, oh, pretend her son was the bastard child of impotent Frank Sinatra (whose widow had to read her crap). Not the type to spend most of her time with her adopted brood, which led Woody, who NEVER lived with her, to seek somebody new.

But let's get back to Dandy Andy.

Andreas Priwin, as he was known in Berlin, had to flee the Nazis in 1938, but fortunately turned up in sunny Los Angeles, where his uncle Charles Previn worked at Universal Studios. Eleven years after leaving Berlin, Andre got his first movie credit, composing music for a Lassie film in 1949 called "The Sun Comes Up." He recalled it as "the most inept score you ever heard."

Previn considered jazz his primary gift, and in 1952 got a shaky start with a 1952 album, "Andre Previn Plays Harry Warren."

Soon he was offering hipper material ("Andre Previn Plays Songs by Vernon Duke" "Andre Previn Plays Songs by Jerome Kern" "Andre Previn Plays Songs by Harold Arlen") and offering jazz-tinged versions of "Pal Joey" and "Gigi" and "West Side Story."

Before "smooth jazz" became a dirty word, Previn was there with "tasteful" albums of sophisticated swing. I liked the one he fashioned out of Duke Ellington material:

I also owned the album he made with Russ Freeman ("Double Play") but mostly for the topless babe on the cover.

Andre was a little less racy by 1962 when he and Doris Day brought "Duet" to the stores, and a few years later the increasingly popular Previn offered "The Popular Previn" in 1965.

By then, Andre had "Best Score" Academy Awards for "Irma La Douce" and "My Fair Lady." He also won a Grammy for "Andry Previn PLays that Old Black Magic" among others.

He had been edging toward the classical field, and was soon earning more fame as both a pianist and a conductor than as a jazz composer and easy-listening album-maker.

He would still dabble in the American Songbook ("The Jerome Kern Songbook" in 1994 with Sylvia McNair and "The Harold Arlen Songbook" in 1996 also with Sylvia McNair).

Sylvia McNair? Not one of his wives. He had five.

The first wife was a jazz singer, Betty Bennett. After nearly five years, it was time for a divorce.

It didn't matter that she was knocked up and loaded with his second child. The divorce was final before the baby appeared.

Wife #2 was the legendary Dory Langan. Under that name, in 1958, she and Andre (with jazz guitar from Kenny Burrell) released her first singing album, "The Leprechauns Are Upon Me." She and Andre began writing songs together, including "The Faraway Part Of Town" (from the all-star flop "Pepe") and "One, Two, Three Waltz" (for, guess what, the movie "One, Two, Three") and "A Second Chance" for the romantic "Two for the Seesaw." Several of their songs were Oscar-nominated. Dory suffered a nervous breakdown but recovered, and co-wrote ""You're Gonna Hear from Me" with Pevin, which was covered by Frank Sinatra. She had her best success when she paired her lyrics to music by Fred Karlin: "Come Saturday Morning" (from "The Sterile Cuckoo") which remains most memorable for the awkward phrase, "just I and my friend."

Andre and his friend Mia Farrow began having an affair. This was most apparent in 1969 when Farrow became pregnant. Dory, shattered, eventually divorced Andre. She suffered more mental ills due to the affair, had shock therapy, and emerged with some rather harrowing, moody and eccentric new solo albums, which were a bit too far to the right of cabaret and art song to appeal to the people who bought Joni Mitchell. (An irony being that her drummer John Guerin would appear on Joni's starker, more jazzy albums done long after Dory was gone from any major label). Still, it might be argued that a few of her quirky songs are a lot more memorable than anything Andre Previn ever composed. "Doppelganger" comes to mind, instantly, from "Reflections in a Mud Puddle."

Dory's 1970 solo album included a song called "Beware of Young Girls," which was about Mia.

And yet, one day the "Beware of Young Girls" grimaces were hurled at Woody Allen by people who a) falsely believed that Woody and Mia were married, and b) falsely believed that they were still together when he began seeing Soon-Yi Previn, and c) falsely believed that Soon-Yi Previn was Woody's daughter, when she was actually adopted back when the cheating Mia and the cheating Andre got married.

Sometimes an affair produces a lasting relationship, and it seemed that way with Mia and Andre. They were married in 1970, and the marriage lasted through the entire 70's. Perhaps one might find it "positive" that Previn would stick up for an ex-wife and put down an adopted daughter at the same time. His hatred of Woody Allen may have played a part, but despite what some may have thought, there was no anti-Semitism involved. Despite his French-sounding new name, Previn, like Woody, had Jewish ancestry.

Andre married wife #4 in 1982, and wife #5 (Anne-Sophie Mutter, a violinist) lasted from 2002 to 2006. Previn and Mutter still performed concerts together, while he continued to rage at Woody Allen for being SUCH an insensitive fellow. As for his adopted daughter Soon-Yi, Andre declared, ""She does not exist."

It's just a bit peculiar that a man who divorced a pregnant wife, cheated on his second wife, and ended up with five failed marriages, became such an outspoken defender of what is right or wrong in relationships.

But let's admire the man's trinkets, which include 4 shiny Oscars and 10 shiny Grammy awards. I have a few of his classical CDs, as both pianist and conductor, and he deserves credit for being taken seriously when snobs could have considered him just a more pedigreed Peter Nero and a minor movie music arranger.

He produced a bunch of children, adopted a few more, and if there were still record stores, you might be able to find that very admirable and prolific number of vinyl albums and CDs that he produced in his long lifetime, which extended from April 6, 1929 to today, February 28, 2019.

N.Y. POST knows their DEMOGRAPHIC: RATS

Report what your readers know best and care about most.

At the N.Y. Post, you know what WHAT means these days.

Todays front page on the Internet features...TWO important stories about RATS.

And since the N.Y. Post demographic can't read TOO well, how lovely that one "story" is a PHOTO and the other a VIDEO.

WANG and DONG in Robert Kraft prostitution bust - "Me Tu?" Who had the Raping Yen?

Ah. Let's not laugh TOO hard.

A woman named WANG and a woman named DONG were arrested as massage parlor whores.

And, for Spoonerism fans, there was YAPING REN, who one assumes was hired by more violent johns who had a raping yen. Or, wanted to pay big yen for rape fantasies.

What, there was no Asian woman named ME TU?

The arrest of horny old Robert Kraft, of the much hated New England Patriots, points up something interest. I mean, beyond the fact that he could afford high priced call girls like Eliot Spitzer bought, but preferred to risk an STD with ordinary massage parlor whores.

The self-righteous news reports all declared that the police had every reason to bust ASIAN massage parlors because...gasp...

....THEY are involved in SEX TRAFFICKING.

Meanwhile, doesn't the #METOO movement and the #TIMESUP bunch, and all the radical feminist parade rally behind sex workers?

Don't they insist that prostitution is a victimless crime, and that women have every right to squeeze as much money out of men as they can?

Don't they believe that men paying for sex is part of a woman's POWER?

Don't they insist that whores be known as "SEX WORKERS?"

Don't they want it all to be legalized?

But here, the spin is that the girls in the ASIAN massage parlors (not the white and black and Latina women who work in plenty of OTHER massage parlors) aren't doing it by choice.

They were imported and duped into "the life."

Really? There's a difference between a black, white or Latina prostitute sucking off Richard Kraft for $100, and an Asian doing it? You think ANY of them are doing it because they LIKE their work?

At best, beating some guy's meat for $50, and taking under five minutes to do it, beats minimum wage at Burger King, doesn't it? "Sex workers" would say YES.

The spin doctoring (or, rather, NURSING, since the feminists are doing it) is that prostitution is now suddenly evil and sex workers are all exploited.

Remember when feminists merely thought it would be nice if the johns got arrested along with the hookers, and were ALSO named and shamed? Not good enough that Robert Kraft is now known as not only a dirty old man, but a cheap one, too?

The justification for beating the drum about Robert Kraft is that he's white and right. And everyone hates the New England Patriots.

The hypocrisy is using the "women are abused" dodge, when they wouldn't if Kraft had been carrying on in a massage parlor full of white women being abused by a Mafia Don, or black women abused by some pimp who is so heartless he still wears fur.

Meanwhile, the photo above...the women are NAMED AND SHAMED. That's a very mixed message coming from the feminists. As mixed as the fact it's ok for a woman to give away sex in return for a ticket to a rock concert with some guy she'll probably not date till he coughs up ANOTHER expensive ticket, but it's not ok for a woman to simply make it a cash business transaction.

The Florida cops were hovering over the Asian massage parlors because they were THAT upset about imports from China using their vaginas? Or was it because they knew they'd nab a high-profile guy like Kraft?

The Florida cops could've invaded crack dens, meth labs or the underpasses crawling with dangerous and armed felons.

Mr. Kraft, the lesson is to pay $1,000 to a white girl you found via an ad on the "Freedom of Speech" internet.

Feminists...try and figure out which side of the bidet you want to stand. Is prostitution ok and a woman's right to use her body as she wants, or is it not? And does it depend on who her pimp might be? If we're talking about who the abusing pimp is who takes more money than he deserves, we are ALL being abused by a pimp named Uncle Sam, who lords over the I.R.S.

Mort Sahl playing to 8 People at the "Crescendo Room" Feb 21, 2019

Honesty is nice, but it's not always necessary.

If you happened to see it mentioned in a local Mill Valley throw-away newspaper or on the Net somewhere, it SOUNDS good:

MORT SAHL performing Live at the Crescendo Room of the Throckmorton Theatre.

Great. In this time when we easily get political news supplied every night by Kimmel and Colbert and there's also a weekly Bill Maher show, plus some stuff on Comedy Central, and "Samantha Bee" and whatnot, somewhere, there's a place for MORT SAHL, even past 90.

Twitter and Facebook will even offer links so you can see the show live (it's a hot ticket right, or you're just a little too far from Mill Valley to get there on the bus.)

The most blatant sign things are not quite what they seem is how Periscope or Facebook runs a tally at the bottom of the screen, listing how many people are watching. These days, it might be 300 people in this nation of 300 million.

In past years, Mort would be helped to his seat in front of the immobile camcorder on a tripod and the show would begin...maybe 10 minutes of new monologue material and then Q&A. Now, some fey fellow announces "Mort Sahl," and the camera is on the already seated living legend.

The camcorder picks up the ambient sound. No lighting, no microphone on Mort.

The mediocre lighting and the soft focus give this an "after dinner memories with Grandpa" feel. It's not quite what one expects from an event billed as "Live at the Crescendo Room," as if its a big place with waiters serving drinks and just off from the main floor's casino.

The Crescendo WAS a nightclub. "The Crescendo Room" is just a room named after it, and not much of a room.

Why show it? Why pan from Mort to the very sparse (eight people?) crowd and the empty chairs?

Honesty...is the best policy?

Before the "reveal," the camcorder stayed in one position as Mort gave a brief take on the latest news (the upcoming Oscar telecast) before answering questions posed by an unseen woman who culled them from the live Facebook feed. Mort was lobbed such mild queries as: "Did you ever meet Lee Radziwill" (Jackie O's recently deceased sister) and "Did you ever meet Castro" (no to both questions). Another was "How did you start performing at the hungry i."

In his replies, Mort digressed to surefire material from the past, including joke-anecdotes on favorite topics like Alexander Haig, Kennedy, Adlai Stevenson and Woody Allen. Basically, any Sahl is better than none at all, even if the ambient camcorder made things sonically difficult.

Still, for a while, one had the illusion that "the room" may have had 2 dozen or maybe even 50 patrons. Why did we have to see it was just 8, and the capacity of the place might be 18?? Just to prove the laughter wasn't canned?

At this point, and certainly following his no-show when booked by Seth Meyers last year, nobody is thinking Mort Sahl is the hottest act in town. But why show the proof that he can't fill a room that holds about 18 people on a Thursday night?

At this point, there's no pretense that Mort might generate a full house anywhere, or that travel is even an option. The website that his "manager" put up for him simply disappeared into oblivion some time last year. The idea was to differ from the existing Mort Sahl dotcom (which I've run ever since the Internet began) by stressing his availability for gigs beyond the "manager's" Throckmorton venue. Poof. That website is gone.

Mort might be better served by a podcast with less painful sound, in which a sidekick takes emailed questions and perhaps a small audience hands around to add a peppering of light laughter. I remember this as the format when Steve Allen was here in New York, doing a show for WNEW. He had a co-host (Mark Simone) and Steve gave a standard invitation for people to drop by. I was there a few times, as was Herb Sargent, wife "Jaynie-Bird," and anyone who happened to be in town, such as Bill Dana. I brought Brother Theodore to the show one memorable afternoon.

There may not have been room for more than 8 of us, along with Steve, Mark and the piano, but nobody was taking videos and nobody was pretending this was the "Crescendo Room" of some kind of larger (by how much?) dinner theater.

Steve of course was a pal and admirer of Mort's and we talked about him now and then (and yeah, I think I had a few conversations with Mort that included a mention of Steve.)

"8 Mort Sahl Fans Can't be Wrong," and it's nice to know that 300, maybe on a very GOOD night, 500, were tuned in via the Internet. But maybe a podcast makes more sense. All one needs is a microphone. Set it up in a living room. Call it "the hungry i room" if you want. And like the great days of radio, let us imagine the visuals.

Post Oscars: "Green Book" had a little too much white in it - and other colorful notions

It seemed like SUCH a wonderful night for REVERSE RACISM. Er, DIVERSITY.

As the NY Times crowed, THREE of the four winning actors were "OF COLOR." Not colored people, of course. "OF COLOR."

The great Spike Lee FINALLY was rewarded for all his glaring and scowling over the years and got an Oscar.

BUT...the "Best Picture" award went to "Green Book," which had too much white in it.

The cheers instantly turned to jeers, and Spike Lee stormed out of the theater in disgust because...nobody is falling for that "Driving Miss Daisy" crap anymore. Nobody is buying the notion that white people EVER helped blacks do anything. Hell, there were no Freedom Riders either. Some kind of myth created Jewish parents whose kids were lost on spring break or something.

"Green Book" was instantly declared unworthy. Not for being nominated, but for winning. Sore winning.

Happily, today's NY POST focused on the positive, which is that after all the #oscarsowhite complaints, the Oscars were SO BLACK!

"Black Panther" won quite a few technical awards, and no doubt as Philip Roth, Elie Weisel, Edward Lewis Wallant, Saul Bellow and Leon Uris sink into the obscurity they deserve, there will be more film adaptations of James Baldwin novels.

Over at "The Gray Lady," the New York Times, there was also joy in the triumph of color vs pale vanilla, lily white awfulness, and anything that smacked of "old school" thinking like Shakespeare or Dickens or Poe or Hemingway or any of the other irrelevant people who should be cast out of libraries. Let's give prestigious literary awards to rappers instead, right Kendrick?

How thrilling that almost no films involving white people were nominated. Oh, that awful "Best Actress" award didn't go the right way. And that movie with Melissa McCarthy and Richard E. Grant, and the one with Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga...at least THOSE made sure to stress GAYNESS. Grant's character was gay, and Lady Gaga's movie made sure to sneak in a Drag Queen sequence, dear.

The real question is when that DIVERSITY beacon of rainbow colors (no white) points toward the New York Times and the New York Post.

It's time they made public the ethnicity and sexual orientation of their employees. If the Best Actor/Actress nominations were 75% OF COLOR this year, then surely, the Post and the Times must have rosters that only include 25% whites.

Let's have DIVERSITY at these newspapers. Most especially, fire any white males over 40.

Well, unless they are gay.

Seems fair, doesn't it?

Let's remember we're in the 21st Century, where talent and ability don't matter, only someone's sexuality and the color of their skin.

As long as the sexuality isn't hetero and the color isn't white...prejudice can be a GOOD thing.

Oscar Broadcast - And It's a Great Night for Gays, Blacks and Latinos! Hooorayyyy!

Oh what a night. DIVERSITY! If you're gay or a gay icon or playing a gay...WHAT A NIGHT!

If you're black or involved in a black movie ("Black Panther" etc.)...WHAT A NIGHT!

If you're a Latino, hell, you've got a LOCK on "Best Foreign Film"....Un NOCHE Grande!!!

But all seriousness aside, as Steve Allen used to say, let's praise ONE thing about the Oscar show this year: NO HOST.

That's right. No smirky, prickly idiot standing up and "giving it" to the over-fed, over-paid, over-dressed assholes in the audience. We all know it's "just in fun" which makes it just plain annoying. The insults are never really too sharp, unless it's a political joke aimed at an easy target.

The show (which I did not watch, except by accident during a few channel flips) ended without too many yawns because there was no idiotic host slowing things down with a monologue, a production number, and tedious segues.

How can I review a show I didn't watch? It's better that way. MUCH better.

First off, I missed the awful "red carpet" foreplay, where preening fools ask "WHO are you wearing" and "Isn't this exciting?"

This was just about the only time you saw white people, and they were fair game for "WORST COSTUME." That's what these things are. Costumes. Even by the effete and tasteless standards of "fashion," nobody would go to a party wearing this shit unless it was Halloween.

For the record, the brickbats bashed Sarah Paulsen and Rachel Weisz:

The whites wearing red made everyone blue.

PS, if a black actress wears a tasteless gown, ignore it.

And if a black ACTOR wears a tasteless gown, praise it:

That's a "tuxedo ballgown."

Speaking of garish, Spike Lee turned up in something purple from the Dr. Seuss collection. With matching glasses. Nobody dared say a word.

I feel badly for Spike. He actually looked happy. This may have broken his face.

It may be difficult, now that he is an OSCAR winner, to walk around sullen and glowering and waiting for Colin Kaepernick to take a knee for him or something.

This year's big winners were black movies mostly, although the very gay "Bohemian Rhapsody" did well, as did Lady Gaga's "A Star is Born," which made sure to have a drag queen scene (for some reason, she played a female who is, exception to the rule, allowed to sing, and not even lip sync at a drag bar). Oh what a lovely coincidence that Lady Gaga, who half-named herself after a crappy campy Freddie Mercury song, was up against the story of Freddie himself in "Bohemian Rhapsody," the title of that one referring to an overlong God-awful bit of campy opera that latent homosexual males can't stop singing (see: "Wayne's World" or, better yet, DON'T.)

This year's Academy Award for BEST ACTOR went to a set of dentures.

The teeth were made by FANGS FX, a company specializing in freakish teeth for horror movies. True.

"Bohemian Rhapsody" was one of the three films I actually bothered to see (via torrent bootlegs, which as we all know, don't harm the sales figures of wildly popular bad movies that embellish the truth to the point where it's all a lie.)

I also saw "A Star is Born." The most remarkable thing about these two movies, is that they featured Andrew "Dice" Clay and Mike Myers, and I didn't recognize either of them until the end credits. That's when I thought, "they were in the movie? Playing WHO?"

This wasn't my favorite Lady Gaga film. That would be "Perform this Way," in which Gaga was played by Weird Al Yankovic.

As for today's most fabulous gay icon this side of the Brawny paper towel guy and the guy in the Burger King mask, Lady Gaga proved once again that fashion is for ugly people to feel better about themselves.

Gays may be enthusiastic about that horrible meringue-head, and they do like drag queen-ish women with huge noses (hmmm, who was the last woman to star in "A Star is Born"...) but some viewers in this world do miss attractive women and the days of Bardot, Dunaway, Fonda and Roberts.

Speaking of repulsive women, the Oscar events did make sure to cover all the pointless parties thrown by people even more affluent and obnoxious than Meghan Markle. At the Vanity Fair party, it was important to honor that feminist icon...

...Monica Lewinsky.

What? She's NOT a movie star. She's still a STAR, darling, because she courageously lifted herself up from a scandal caused by the mean slut-shaming press, and is now recognized for...

...being a home-wrecker? For flashing her thong at the President with a lascivious look on her pudgy face? For making herself available as a cigar holder? For plotting with her extremely homely pal to keep her cocksucking dress as evidence so that she could impeach just about the last President to preside over a nation where the interest rate on a CD was actually in two digits and not 1%?

Monica looks so surprised to be wearing a gown without semen stains on it.

The important thing for women is that, even if they don't know anything about politics, they can coyly grin and pretend that they do. Cue the "smart and intelligent" dames from SNL.

That's Maya Rudolph in the botanical outfit borrowed from "Little Shop of Horrors." Next to the perpetually smirking Tina Fey is her pal Amy Poehler, who was always so hilarious when she'd hop around playing an amputee. It's really a tie between Amy's amputee routines and Wiig's tasteful performances as the birth-defect victim with tiny hands.

They were around to let us know that Trump's an asshole. Bill Maher's been saying that for years, but hey, Bill Maher is a straight white guy.

No no, this is a broadcast, so, borrowing a Roger Grimsby line, we must watch as broadcasting becomes two words.

Trump had to be seething over that clever dig from the Latino who introduced "Best Foreign Picture." Ha ha, he spoke in SPANISH. (Some of the nominees were not Latino, but fuck 'em.)

We all know, it's absolutely RACIST to suggest that immigrants learn the language and speak English. America is rapidly becoming bi-lingual. With the SAP channel on TV, and various Spanish language newspapers and TV networks, and every government booklet printed in Spanish, it's no longer essential to learn English.

Senator Hayakawa of California (this goes back a few decades) actually introduced a bill suggesting English be the "OFFICIAL" language of America. Silly fellow. Just because he spoke English, and Japanese, Chinese, Koreans, Russians and Hebrews and Greeks all not only learned English but did so despite having to also master a completely different-looking set of characters, that didn't mean that Latinos should have to. Likewise, just because every immigrant group from the Germans to the Italians to the Poles all managed to learn English without difficulty, it's an OUTRAGE to suggest that Latinos be inconvenienced. It's not that they CAN'T learn the language, because everyone's equal, it's just...well...it's just...uh...que lastima, there MUST be a reason besides laziness...

If you've spent time in Montreal, you know the headache of having to hear every goddam announcement in both French and English. But let's have that happen in America. Because Latinos should not have to learn English the way every other ethnic group does.

There's logic to this. Un poco, eh?

It's an irony that all over the world, English is a second language. Get off a plane in Nigeria, in Seoul, in Israel, in France, in just about any place other than Scotland, and you will find people able to talk to you in very understandable ENGLISH. People all over the world love the English language and its culture. In America, among immigrants from Latino countries? Not so much. People can be in America five years, ten years, even longer, and they still can't speak the language. Yet boxers from Ukraine, Russia, the Philippines, can speak it and answer questions after a fight and after being hit in the head for ten rounds. What's the problem here?

But I digress. Lo siento.

But let's not dwell on the Latinos when there's Blacks to praise, and it was so nice that both the "Best Supporting Actor" and "Best Supporting Actress" winners were black. Then again, was it? What's this "supporting" term? You relegate BLACKS to "SUPPORTING actor and SUPPORTING actress?" Something wrong there, know wuttum sayin'?

Next year, elevate those words to just "ALSO BEST ACTOR" and "ALSO BEST ACTRESS" or something. "SUPPORTING" is so DEMEANING. It's INSULTING.

But let's praise the Academy for seeing through Richard E. Grant, the STRAIGHT OLDER WHITE MALE who had the NERVE to play a gay guy. How did he even get nominated? How did he even get HIRED? Don't you have to BE gay to play a gay now? Didn't he take money away from some deserving gay who was only begging for a chance to blow Harvey Weinstein to get ahead?

Let's ALSO praise the Academy for NOT being sentimental when it comes to aging white people, and for not only kicking Richard E. Grant into the "it's an honor just to be nominated" level, but also disappointing Glenn Close. The woman really should retire and be replaced by a young black woman. Hell, if a black woman could play Joan of Arc on Broadway this season, that same woman can play any old white woman role that some fool might want to give to Glenn Close.

A few final points. First, for purists, the Academy Awards once again offered the opportunity for millions upon millions of people to be bored by preening, giggling, self-absorbed non-entities who won in obscure categories for short subjects NOBODY has ever seen.

Rich self-righteous assholes got to clutch a gold figurine of a naked guy, wave it like a club, and declare their fierce belief that MOVIES MATTER.

Second, QUEEN got a chance to perform, and opened the ceremonies. Adam Lambert gave powerful evidence for why people miss Freddie Mercury.

And lastly, the "In Memorium" sequence was, as always, the best part of the show. In this case, "In Memorium" refers to white heterosexuals. It's just about the only place on the Oscar telecasts you see 'em anymore.

The heterosexual white woman who won for "Best Actress" for a film nobody's seen? That was a fluke. A little more DIVERSITY next time, please!

A Definition of Bravery

BRAVERY...is using a discount GROUPON for EYE SURGERY...

Meanwhile, you do wonder in some cases, what IS the "Deal" with Groupon?

Those bargain eyeglasses are gonna fall apart?

The bargain sheets are gonna rip?

How about this one...what's the bargain? That it's just an hour with a slobbery St. Bernard that has a long tongue?

Is it true the Jezz Bezo marriage ended because he was having phone sex with Alexa?

AND NOW A WORD FROM APPLE...sing it, ELTON...

Hashtag... "Confucius NEVER said..."

Yeah, another #hashtag game I couldn't resist.

Let's play comedy writer. Think up something for...

...something Confucius DID NOT SAY...

OK, this one got an almost immediate "Ancient Wisdom Point" -- which doesn't translate into a yen.

Another one I did climbed from three, to ten, to twenty, and on and on LIKES -- which ALSO doesn't translate into a yen.

Gotta love social media (not a lot) for wasting time AND giving you an idea of what's out there.

I actually got a few troll calls on this one. Some good Liberal soul declared that YELLOWFACE was BAD.

Er, yeah.

And another re-tweeted to complain about racism.

Duh. I did bother to explain to them that this was what "Confucius NEVER said." First off, he was dead long before Peter Sellers did his goofy Asian movie characters, and second, he would NEVER want himself portrayed that way. That was the joke, son.

OK, 1% didn't get it. As Carson used to say "it comes with the territory."

The other day Kevin Pollak mentioned how aggravating it is when ONE person in the audience yawns, or sit there with a grim expression. "It all goes..." he made a motion with his hand, downward. Instead of enjoying ALL the people who LIKE the joke, you feel the nagging needle over the one prick who didn't get it.

In this case, it was two, because aside from people who just don't happen to laugh at a joke, the number doubles thanks to some self-righteous sourpuss who is spoiling for a reason to complain. A member of the Comic Thought Police. Seriously, let's make sure ALL humor is inoffensive!

VALENTINE'S DAY

People look at old tweets? They search for something and...re-Tweet it?? Somebody was searching for posts on Tyne Daly or something...

A year after I posted it, somebody re-Tweeted this one:

Has Rep. Ilhan Omar heard of SIMCHA ROTEM?

Ilhan Omar, she of the smooth make-up and the fashionable headgear, is now claiming she's "STANDING STRONG."

Meaning, that she has no plans to resign for her blatant anti-Semitism. It was all a mistake. An oversight. She'd like to sit down with Chelsea Clinton and others, and have a little chit-chat about why Jews don't have ALL the money and power in the world, and why BDS isn't such a lovely idea.

On the latter point, where her taste for watching Jews starve, she is hardly alone. Such well-fed rock stars as Roger Waters, Peter Gabriel and Patti Smith are bellowing along with her.

Did any of them note the passing, less than two months ago, of SIMCHA ROTEM?

Back in the 40's, he was just an ordinary young man. Do we need to know his religion?

In Poland, he was one of THREE MILLION Jews in the country. But, as Jews would discover in so many countries, the sudden tide of Nazism made them scapegoats. Made them prisoners starving in captivity. Made them rounded up for extermination.

Such is the history of the Jews, unlike any other group on Earth.

Simcha Rotem, among 400,000 surviving Jews, were imprisoned in what is now known as the "Warsaw Ghetto," a virtual prison, about one square mile, from which people were starved, and routinely picked off and sent to concentration camps. The BDS movement in Poland was brutal. Jews owned nothing. They starved.

As the Washington Examiner reported, in their obit on Mr. Rotem, the Jews in the ghetto "sought to maintain some semblance of normality in their nightmare-lives...schools...soup kitchens...these gestures toward humanity were doomed...Inhabitants were restricted to starvation rations. The only means of survival involved bartering or smuggling. Disease was rampant. In the summerof 1942...100,000 Jews in Warasw had already died of malnutrition or disease, deportations in the guise of "resettlement" commenced to the death camps..."

Simcha Rotem and some of his friends tried to find a way out.

They found the sewers.

"It was no pleasure to flounder in excrement, to smell the stench, but we had no choice...It was sometimes necessary to crawl on our bellies to get through..."

The literal light at the end of the tunnel came in 1946, when Simcha Rotem arrived in one of the very few, very small places on Earth that a Jew could feel safe. Palestine. It was there that he fought again, alongside those who wanted their homeland to be called ISRAEL.

And now? Ilhan Omar justifies Tweets about the BDS movement, and how the Jews should be starved out of their only homeland, the only "Jewish State" in the world, a sliver of a sandbox which is constantly under attack from anti-Semites. From terrorist groups throwing bombs at women and children to gigantic countries such as Iran threatening nuclear destruction, Israel is hardly a paradise.

But for Simcha Rotem it was home.

He was the last known survivor of the "Warsaw Ghetto," and the last who could say, from experience, that IT HAPPENED. Do not deny that it HAPPENED.

Rep. Ilhan Omar, late of Somalia, now a proud member of Congress in America, would have Israel experience the terrors of the Warsaw Ghetto, and have the Jews starved out. Starvation was something Simcha Rotem knew well in Poland. He crawled through the sewers to reach Israel and find a new life in "The Jewish State." Such a thing angers Rep. Ilhan Omar. She has stated there shouldn't BE such a thing. BDS should put an end to Israel. Jews who are STILL persecuted in France, Germany, and all over Europe, and who want to come to Israel? They can go to hell?

Their parents and grandparents have already been there.

#COMPLIMENT A MONSTER

I know, it's almost a SCAB thing to do...giving away some comedy on the Internet.

The excuse is, what, that it might be good publicity?

That somebody on the staff of SNL or Jimmy Kimmel will say "Hey, we NEED this great comedy mind...."

Dream on.

But as Neil Simon once said, and Steve Allen, and so many others, "It's a curse...thinking funny."

So when some Twitter hashtag game turns up, it's hard NOT to instantly think of something.

The HASHTAG was "Compliment a Monster."

So...

One more?

Who doesn't like in-jokes?

The people who aren't in on it.

But the people who ARE getting a special kick out of recognition humor.

There's a cult for "The Indestructible Man." Put it that way.

Ilhan Omar - Radical Muslim Jew-Hater has "apologized" but...no, she really hasn't

Power corrupts. Don't we KNOW that by now?

As soon as somebody gets some power, the BULLY comes out. In this case, we have someone newly elected to Congress who starts doing what Trump does, and spending too much time on Twitter. As in shouting about how politicians pay attention to Jewish lobbyists with money.

Yes, somebody in Congress, born in Somali (the country that has been forgiven for the Somali pirates terrorizing passing ships) is declaring that Jewish money is helping Israel remain a country (when, what, it should either by wiped off the Earth or given to the Palestinians? Why the hashtag #Palestine, lady?)

She is also on record as telling voters that she supports BDS and sanctions against Israel.

People were ecstatic that THE FIRST MUSLIM WOMAN was elected to Congress. OH HAPPY DAY! ALLAH BE PRAISED!

Only this woman was praising ALLAH and hoping ALLAH would get the job done against Israel:

Rep. Omar wasn't asking other members of Congress for help. She wasn't even asking all those lovable Arabs in the Middle East for help. She didn't even go to the U.N. which so often rules against Israel.

She went to her invisible friend ALLAH.

All that you need do in America, IF you write something vicious against people who aren't known for violence, is shrug and offer a mealy-mouthed "apology."

So we got:

"It’s now apparent to me that (it MIGHT be an) anti-semitic trope I unknowingly used, which is unfortunate and offensive."

Ah, how unfortunate. Not unfortunate enough for her to resign like Senator Al Franken who merely posted a jokey photo, and may have touched somebody's ass during a crowded photoshoot.

Still Tweeting and Tweeting, the Muuslim insisted rich Jews were lobbying and all their "Benjamins" placed on the table or in the back pockets of politicians, were letting Israel get away with bullying, abuse, and "hypnotizing" the world into thinking that Jews should have a homeland.

Somehow, she left ALLAH out of it this time.

Why? Surely, Allah is all powerful and COULD wipe Israel off the face of the globe, as easily as that Christian God drowned the world for 40 days and 40 nights.

Allah could blow up all he banks and burn ONLY the money in the vaults of the Jews.

Allah can do anything and everything. He's not just off somewhere beyond Uranus, uptight and outta sight. He's HERE. He sees ALL. He listens to prayers, just like the other unvisibles that other religious fanatics pray to.

Isn't it a bit disturbing when religion and politics mix?

When somebody who dresses in Muslim garb and got elected for being Muslim, instantly starts attacking Jews? And the Jewish homeland?

She gets in power and she abuses it. She abuses it in a way different from older, more reasonable politicians.

Can any of us can remember how often a President started a message with "JESUS...please do what you can about Hitler...Saddam...Kim...Putin..."

Strangely, Omar's Tweets about Jewish lobbyists and the stereotype of "Jewish money" being behind everything powerful, got more attention than the one where she was hoping ALLAH would get Israel. That one got little attention a few weeks ago, and her mild apology was enough.

Nancy Pelosi and Chelsea Clinton weren't huffing about THAT one. Just the "Jewish money" crack.

How a feminist like Omar feels about some aspects of Islam, such as terrorists being rewarded with virgins, I have no idea.

Omar batted her big brown eyes and decared of Chelsea Clinton (who married a Jew) is that she's willing to have a "discussion" about the "trope" of anti-semitic rhetoric. Oh, how nice, one always enjoys a meaningful discussion of tropes when the Zeitgeist of the threnody has undergone a level change.

What has never changed is that people in power abuse it. Ain't no man righteous, not one. And no WOMAN either.

This past year, the media was gushing about how many WOMEN were elected to office in America. MORE of that. Why? Reverse sexism.

WOMEN in power makes sense because WOMEN are mothers, and WOMEN are kind, and WOMEN are gentle.

Just look at Marie Antoinette. Countess Bathory. Margaret Thatcher. Imelda Marcos.

HOORAY! THE WORLD IS SAVED.

Just not if you're Jewish. Then again, as we've known for well over 2,000 years, Jews don't really have any rights. They don't deserve a homeland. Not even a few reservations where they might make some casino money.

Indians can make casino money. But oh those Jews. We all know they still have ALL the money (not the oil-rich Arabs of the Middle East) and they use it to...uh...hold onto a sliver of sand that is constantly being bombarded by bombs and threatened with extinction. Meanwhile the oil-rich Arabs barely allow women like OMAR to drive a car or vote.

Omar apologized for the suggestion that Jews have had an influence in lobbying for Israel.

She added that, gee, come to think of it, lobbyists should watch it, whoever they are lobbying for. It's SUCH a shame there's so much LOBBYING going on.

She then brought up the NRA, which is an American issue. She suggested that there's too much lobbying in general. But specifically, she went after a fairly minor Jewish group that, by comparison with other lobbyists, was not offering a whole lotta BENJAMINS.

In her meandering apology, the 37 year-old touched on something that she damn well should've known already: that WHATEVER you are, SOMEBODY is going to hate you because of it.

Here's the non-apology:

The question is whether the Jew-haters of the world will let this go, and NOT go back and take a second look at her ALLAH, please help us against ISRAEL squealing.

Israel HYPNOTIZES the world? Let's just say Israel is not exactly Kreskin. Israel hasn't hypnotized Patty Smith, Roger Waters or Peter Gabriel, the sensitive artists-poets-singers who want the Jews there to starve to death with BDS sanctions.

Israel hasn't hypnotized the Middle East nations in allowing one of its tennis players to be allowed in a tournament, or a beauty contest winner to say hello to any Muslim contestant.

Israel hasn't hypnotized the lovable Palestinians into not being terrorists lobbing bombs at women and children, or hiding their munitions in schools or hospitals.

Israel hasn't hypnotized the Academy Awards or Grammy Awards people into making sure there are more Jewish nominees, or movies or songs that have a Jewish theme. It's been a long time since "Exodus" and "Schindler's List."

Can you imagine if Donald Trump declared that he wished JESUS would do something about Mexico?

But Omar can ask ALLAH to do something about Israel, and she has YET to apologize for her religious fanaticism and dangerous jeering and hateful rhetoric.

She once complained that Israel is called a "Jewish" state: "I see Israel institute laws that recognize it as a Jewish state and does not recognize the other religions that are living in it."

She doesn't understand that Jews are stating they have a HOMELAND, after all those years of being settlers who got kicked out of the countries they emigrated to, and were victims of pogroms and genocide? If they can't live peacefully as Jews in Russia or Germany or Poland or France how about...ISRAEL. HEAR, OH ISRAEL. The country that the Christian Pat Boone wrote the "Exodus" lyrics for: "This land is mine, God gave this land to me."

French is the official language of France. "The Jewish" State is Israel. "The Hoosier State" is Illinois. "The Big Apple" is New York City, which isn't to say that oranges aren't allowed.

Smug Omar snickered that Israel, which does allow anyone to live there, and is a "Holy Land" where Christians come to see important sites, is no democracy:

“And we still uphold it as a democracy in the Middle East I almost chuckle because I know that if we see that any other society we would criticize it, call it out...I see that now happening with Saudi Arabia and so I am aggravated, truly, in those contradictions.”

Saudi Arabia, whose people destroyed the World Trade Center, and who kill journalists, and who don't give women their rights. Omar is busy growling that Israel calls itself "The Jewish State" because it is predominantly Jewish, and is a safe haven, for example, for the latest victims of pogroms in various areas in and around Russia, and for thousands of French Jews who no longer feel safe in that country.

No apologies for her twisted views of Israel compared with the lethal and intolerant countries America has warred with, such as Iraq and Iran, or the countries America tolerates because of BIG OIL, such as Saudi Arabia.

She apologized only for going to far on the touchy subject of Jews having "all the money" and using it to keep people down. Odd isn't it, that for such an influential people, the Jews have had to flee so many countries, and continue to have the highest rate of bias crimes against them wherever they go. How come they haven't bought off the cops and the politicians who ignore or even encourage the attacks?

The sad line buried in her apology: "....I expect people to hear me when others attack me for my identity."

That's the tragedy. She should know better.

Once you've encountered prejudice, you should be able to see that just as YOU don't like it, you shouldn't do it to others. But, hey, we know that a lot of pedophiles were abused as children. They're excuse is that they're too busy getting even to be reasonable.

Omar? If you know that the word MUSLIM brings fear and loathing to some people, because it connotes unreasonable fanaticism, and blowing shit up, then you should ALSO know that pointing a finger at someone for NOT believing in ALLAH is just as ignorant and destructive. Declaring ISRAEL (not not North Korea, China, or Putinville) should get ALLAH' attention is extremely flagrant in its racism.

Why the demonizing of a few Jews with money, when most of the people who have money are NOT Jewish? Most banks are NOT run by Jews. Amazon is run by Jeff Bezos, who is NOT your typical crafty Jewish businessman.

What would happen if a Jewish member of Congress complained that the ARABS are so powerful, a journalist's murder remains unpunished?

Why hasn't Omar pointed out the very strong influence the Saudis have, to the point of deflecting blame for 9/11?

American currency says "IN GOD WE TRUST," but not "IN JESUS WE TRUST."

Here's somebody calling on ALLAH to get involved in politics, specifically the JEWISH STATE. A few weeks later, the same person spreads the harmful stereotype of creepy Jews having all the money and controlling the world. That guy Haddid, who made his daughters into superstars because he bought them powerful publicists. He's a landlord, yes. Jewish? No. The Kardashians aren't Jewish. The people keeping women from voting or having equal rights, or not having their genitalia circumcised...NOT Jewish. Google the biggest banks and most powerful corporations and you won't see too many Jewish names. The Jews weren't behind the murder of a journalist in their embassy, and they didn't blow up the World Trade Center. So what happens when you accuse Jews and only Jews, over and over, and you don't do the same thing to any other religious group? Not much.

TRUTH IN RECORD COVERS #85902

There are a lot of fake record covers around. Guffaw. But this one IS real.

You look at the guy and yeah. The word DICK comes to mind.

For the record (see what I did) this thing was released in France, where slang English terms may not have been well known.

Tomi Ungerer Has Died

The news today about artist Tomi Ungerer is sketchy. Apparently, he simply died in his sleep, sometime between Friday night and Saturday morning.

Hopefully it was indeed a peaceful end.

His daughter kept up his Twitter and Facebook accounts, and it seemed like he was, as usual, in the midst of lectures, awards, and re-issues of his famous children's books. The latest news on social media, only a few days ago, was that there was an interview with Tomi in a new issue of Comics Journal. Oddly, the mag made a point of "introducing" Tomi to American readers, claiming that he was better known in Europe.

"I'm tired," he said to me, or to nobody in particular, as he signed books at a gallery in Greenwich Village. This was about six years ago. The gallery had two rooms. One of them was for his children's art, and his political satire, including posters and ads that first appeared in the Village Voice. The second room, with a warning sign on it, was for his ADULT drawings, which involved dark fetish themes, "misogyny," and hilarious depictions of futility, control, decadence, and libertine lunacy.

People had the opportunity to wander the galleries, and then listen to Tomi give a lecture and take questions. I remember one question involved whether a certain book was going to be reprinted or not. "Oh," the elderly man said with a sigh, "that is so old. So long ago." He was promoting a new book, actually, "Fog Island," which was inspired by his lifestyle in Ireland.

Born in Alsace, displaced by the Nazi invasion, and scarred for life by the bewildering destruction of French culture by the invading Germans. He wrote about all of this, and spoke about it when requested via a Q&A session. He sometimes mentioned, with some nostalgic pride, how he and his mother were sometimes able to outwit the Germans and get around some of their oppressive rules. But he also mentioned, with ache and longing, how he was in some ways a man without a country, and that it was reflected in his adopted first name, "Tomi." Yes, it was unique and he had reason to be proud of that (it was pronounced TOE-ME) but somehow there was a sadness he carried with it, too.

He came to America with $60 and a lot of drawings. In an American Dream come true, he met a book editor who loved his work, and his first children's book was soon published.

He became, like his friend Shel Silverstein, simultaneously known for children's books and for adult humor. Playboy sponsored both of them. Tomi was also appearing in leftist and liberal magazines and newspapers, from the failed Monocle to the rising star Village Voice. Uniquely, the advertising world embraced him too. Perhaps, in an age NOT dominated by social media, Madison Avenue didn't even know about Tomi's adult cartoons, or worried that clients might balk at using a "pervert."

It was, oddly enough, the adult material, not the kiddie books, that served as my introduction to the last truly great ARTIST working in the media of political and magazine cartoons.

I was in the Marboro bookshop, long out of business, but at the time on busy 8th Street in the West Village, not too far from where I met Tomi several times at art show events. Marboro was where you could pick up the "dangerous" books published by Grove Press, including notorious authors Henry Miller and Hubert Selby. It was also the place for cheap "remainders," especially humor books that had run their course or hadn't sold at all. I got my copy of "Ensign O'Toole and Me" there, probably for a dollar. It was there that I picked up several books by Robert Paul Smith. And a few back issues of Monocle (which was a perfect bound, vertical-tilted magazine/journal). It was there that I picked up a book of Tomi's drawings, published in Germany. Fortunately, as with almost all his work, there were no captions.

His erotic, humorous art was pure that way.

Some of his erotic work even turned up in posters. I had one on the wall of my college dorm. It was, thinking about it now, kind of a bewildering image. It was a drawing of a woman in medieval garb. Her bodice was open, and she revealed...half a grapefruit. The rest of it was in her hand. Somehow, she was enjoying her own juice. Not milk. Citrus.

Most of his erotica symbolism was a lot more direct.

His works sometimes hinged on the obvious power women have even in submission, and the childlike nature of men, and their joy in "getting lucky" or being rewarded with any kind of attention or affection.

Most of his best known posters could've been framed and displayed in a dentist's waiting room, including his various ads for the Village Voice, and items that appeared in the New York Times.

I still hadn't really noticed that he'd written kiddie books.

Unfortunately, the kiddie book world began to notice that he created "dirty" illustrations. In the 80's, indignant librarians began to remove Tomi's works from the kiddie shelves.

Ungerer's most prosperous days, which coincided with the challenging 60s and included dynamic artwork on politics and race, were over. He retreated from New York City and moved to a rural farm in Canada.

Fortunately, and I think with the help of his daughter, and the supportive world of art galleries and art publications, the Renaissance Man had a renaissance in America. Of course, he was always popular in Europe, where he would eventually have an art museum created in his honor, and filled with the prolific genius's works (over 10,000 drawings and sculptures and "toys.")

He was an artist who worked in a variety of styles. He liked collage.

He saw the world in a unique way and often created sculptures out of things that he accumulated.

His famous posters used a familiar style people came to know.

And yet, hundreds of his drawings were in more traditional art forms, and he was at home using both pen and ink, and watercolor. The soft style of his children's books was vastly different from the acidic lines of his erotica.

His commercial work could be in any style. One wouldn't even recognize this as an Ungerer work unless told:

This is why, until today, I referred to him as "our greatest living artist."

I am not an art historian, but I think those in the arts would have a tough time pointing to anyone else as being more versatile, and working in so many different media. Did Calder create brilliant posters and erotica, or mostly sculpture? When you think of Mondrian or Miro, do you picture their works in your mind in anything but one style? Are certain artists, such as Whistler, known for only one work, and one done in a familiar style used by many? There's a very good reason why there is an entire museum for Tomi Ungerer.

His books (over 100) were translated all over the world. He himself wrote in French, German and English.

The last of the line, I think Ungerer re-emerged in America after the passing of Saul Steinberg, Dr. Seuss, William Steig and Shel Silverstein. Steig and Silverstein were both curmudgeonly types but who were well loved for their kiddie books. Now, the last man standing, and standing quite tall, was Tomi Ungerer.

I remember him at a Village gallery where he demonstrated for the plentiful kids in the audience, how he created his work. He magically turned blank paper into images of owls and pigs, as the kids howled with delight. You can see a portion of this in "Far Out is Not Far Enough," the documentary that was Kickstarter-funded. I remember the cameras being there, and wondered what obscure French TV network or American public access show it was for. Or whether it was just the gallery recording it for posterity. Fortunately, no, it was part of the documentary, and at one point, you can even see me in the audience.

(Parenthetically, I note that this was my motion picture debut! I was actually paid for two days' work as an extra on "Private Parts," the Howard Stern movie, but you can't even see me in that one.)

If Tomi Ungerer sometimes stunned or surprised audiences, he could be surprised, too. At least, he was caught off guard when I asked him if he'd ever met Spike Milligan. He said he hadn't, and then, with a very curious look on his face, asked me why I'd asked. I explained that in some ways, he reminded me of Spike. Spike was also beloved by children, wrote children's books, was a "spike" like Tomi (long and tall), and had such a sense of the ridiculous, but with that undercurrent of tragedy. Spike's cartooning was not anywhere near Tomi's, of course. "I would have liked to have met him," Tomi told me.

It was at another event, ending with a book signing, several years later, where the still vibrant artist said "I'm tired." In fact, when all the books were signed and the long line of people gone, he stood up to leave, and momentarily lost his balance. Someone was there to catch him, but he was not in danger of falling. He was just...tired.

At one time, he was the exact opposite, of course. Like my friends Brother Theodore and Mort Sahl, Tomi was a handful in his prime. In the "Comics Journal" interview that just came out, he recalled a lot of his "pure anger" in the 60's, and the times he was enraged by the affluent idiots he met when he lived on Long Island and attended their ostentatious parties:

"Money, money, money — everything is money. And their star fucking. If they can have a famous artist or a famous something there, they love that. Oh, I took my revenge on a lot of them. One thing I did a lot of times, when I was in Long Island, I broke into these people’s houses when they were not there and spent the night there. One night I went with my wife and I remember this big mansion. I’d been invited there, and there was a hose in the front of the garden, in front of the main door. It was 2 o’clock in the morning and I rang the bell and the light went on and finally, the guy came down. Of course, he didn’t recognize me in the dark and he opened the door and I had his own hose with the water jet directly in his face. And then we scrammed. By the time the police came, everything was gone, the water was gone."

The last time I saw Tomi, I brought my old German edition book with me, the one I'd bought some 40 years earlier at Marboro. This now very obscure tome impressed Tomi, and he mentioned that it was one of his earliest publications in Germany. Maybe even the first. He signed my book, as well as my copy of one of his children's books for sale, with his usual flourish. He also studiously went to his ink pad and stamp, and added "Don't Hope, Cope."

I'm not sure what was behind this. Was he now adding a stamped item as authentication against rising forgeries? Did somebody give him the stamp and he fell in love with it? I have no idea. I have an earlier signed book without the stamp, and two with the stamp.

Tomi did not visit America often, but he didn't need to. He was now living in the writer-friendly country of Ireland, and he had his own museum in Strasbourg, and invitations to lecture and accept awards in all the countries of Europe.

He was also the architect of this wonderful cat house:

He was most certainly best known for the kiddie books, but there was still a lot of respect for his still-relevant political posters and cartoons and, perhaps more quietly, for his erotica. Most of it had been gathered up in "Fornicon" and "Erotoscope" among others. Both are huge books; I think Tomi was not given enough credit for not only the genius of his works, but how MUCH there was of it.

In his latter years, he was once again concentrating on children's works. That would explain why there was a "Fog Island," and not a new tome of erotica. After all, one tends to go where one is appreciated, and it's hard to ignore all the bright, happy faces of children holding their copies of Mellops titles or "The Three Robbers," and hoping for more.

This is a sad day. This is a very, very sad day. It was truly a need, and a balm, to have someplace to write my remembrances of him today.

Bless him, that he died in his sleep, apparently in no pain beyond the usual aches and pains of old age. He was 87. To those who are sad, and wish that he could have continued for another decade, Tomi might offer three words:

"Don't Hope. Cope."

The London Daily Fail: "Blackface" is the biggest problem in USA, especially 50 Years ago

The right-wing British looney-news, The London Daily Mail, has done it again.

It's another click-bait article of finger-pointing and nose-picking. Usually Piers Morgan is the one to cry wolf, but since he's been roundly shouted down for his latest preposterous yapping, he wasn't available to tiptoe through American history and get in a tizzy over something across the pond.

You notice the #metoo movement has collapsed? The attention span for ANYTHING is pretty short. Today's hysteria is over BLACKFACE.

Carrying on about a legitimately disturbing example of BLACKFACE is one thing. Discovering the Governor of Virginia wearing obviously racist BLACKFACE in a college yearbook in the 1980's is disturbing. The 1980's? Minstrel shit in the 1980's?

But to try and feather the "tar" of Billy Crystal imitating Sammy Davis Jr. is something else. There was nothing racist about that, anymore than there was anything racist about Sammy Davis Jr. doing impressions of Cary Grant and Frankie Laine on stage. What Billy was doing was a tribute, and he did it while Sammy was alive and very capable of speaking out if he was offended.

BLACKFACE is generally considered to be a minstrel-level deliberate insult. There's no other intent than to demean, degrade, and get a lot of cheers from bigots.

Fallon? What next, the #metoo ladies are going to go after him for dressing in drag as a blonde idiot Valley Girl? Isn't he DEMEANING WOMEN? Isn't it cruel and vicious for a MAN to mimic the mannerisms of a high school twit who is female? Why didn't he mimic a male high school twit instead? He obviously HATES WOMEN and his goal is to see blonde idiot Valley Girls beaten up in school. Right?

When did the PC movement go absolutely deaf and blind? Er, hearing impaired and visually limited?

Ted Danson's BLACKFACE incident, at an event honoring Whoopi Goldberg, didn't offend Whoopi Goldberg. While Ted's level of taste and humor could be questioned, his intent was to confront those objecting to him, a white man, having a relationship with a black woman.

Jimmy Kimmel (the Daily Fail doesn't know how to spell his name) is just one of many who openly worship black athletes. I have no idea what the particular photo was referencing, but it would be ludicrous to suggest the man did it with the intent to please bigots.

The Daily Fail's slant seems to be that Kimmel, Fallon, and just about anyone else, had better shut up and not complain about actual BLACKFACE, because they're guilty, guilty, guilty.

Meanwhile, there are legitimate concerns about REDFACE too (the Washington Redskins) and Asians aren't too thrilled with some of the YELLOWFACE comedy of Peter Sellers ("Murder By Death" a good example) and Indians and Pakistanis aren't thrilled with the BROWNFACE humor of Sellers in "The Party." It comes down to intent, and whether that intent is to promote hatred and persecution, or whether there's an element of healthy kidding, or even celebration (as with Warner Oland and Sidney Toler versions of Charlie Chan).

There's also a good question over whether any ethnic humor is all that funny. The London Daily Fail, if they looked, could find many examples of people making fun of the British. Mike Myers' and his grotesque teeth in the Austin Powers movies, for one example.

There are also plenty of other problems in the world besides feigning great concern over one particular minority over all others. The London Daily Fail might look at what the Simon Weisenthal Center sent its members the other day.

It was a two page letter outlining the latest examples of anti-Semitism around the world. Not just in America. And what country was second (behind France) in being reported on?

"In the UK anti-Semitic attacks are at record levels according to a report by Community Security Trust released this year, with 2017 witnessing a 34% rise in violent assaults against Jewish people. Meanwhile the country's Labour Party is rife with anti-Semitism..."

We're supposed to view BLACKFACE as particularly heinous, but not REDFACE. We're supposed to get upset about some Judy Garland movie from 70 years ago, but not the owner of the Washington Redskins refusing to change the team's name. We're supposed to also ignore how racism is played for fun. For example, the baiting of Mexicans against Puerto Ricans, and vice versa, in major boxing matches. It's called a "rivalry," but it's gotten ugly many many times.

The Weinsenthal Center noted: "Seventy-five years after the Holocaust, hundreds of thousands of Europe's Jews are standing at the edge of a dangerous precipice."

The Weinsenthal Center also took a look at obscure little Norway, which supposedly has a wonderfully run government, all kinds of benefits for its citizens, and a load of peace and harmony: "In Norway a new report found that one-third of Jewish high school students in Oslo are harssed verbally or physically at least twice a month."

If only all that was going on were a few idiots wearing "Groucho glasses" with a big nose, and going "OY OY OY." Not so.

Yet the London Daily Fail didn't pick up on the press release from the Weisenthal Center. Nor did they acknowledge that slavery in America was abolished well over seventy-five years ago, and was only allowed in part of the country, and even then, it was so intolerable, millions of white people died in battle over it.

BLACKFACE in the 80's, in such crude photos as appeared in the Governor of Virginia's yearbook, IS a shock. It's a damn shock. But pointing at Billy Crystal imitating Sammy Davis Jr. is a damn schlock.

What's important IS calling attention to matters that are serious, and NOT trivializing them with inane witch hunts. We saw this when legitimate problems, such as Harvey Weinstein's abuses as a producer, spilled into Senator Al Franken being hounded from the senate by Senator Kristin Gillibrand, over a few fanny pats and a gag photo.

Anyone point out WHITEFACE? Such as the Wayan Brothers doing a movie and impersonating white women? Want to go back and point a finger at Eddie Murphy impersonating white people, and an old Jew, in "Coming to America?" In that one, people laughed WITH Eddie Murphy. Nobody was too concerned about it. Nobody was saying, "Hey, Eddie Murphy be a racist, just like Malcolm X who said all those vicious things about Jews..." No. It was a tour-de-FARCE that Eddie could do an impersonating, and nothing more.

Hey, London Daily Fail. NOTHING MORE, OK? Save your bandwidth and your fingerpointing for real issues.