Now, nobody would even think of doing a website version for such a thing. Hell, all you need to know about EBAY you can find on its website. Or, Google a few terms and find out what people love and hate about EBAY.
The funny thing about EBAY MAGAZINE is that the staffers knew all about my BLOG, which ranted and raved at the stupidity of some of the sellers, the bad manners of some of the bidders, and the frustrations of using the site.
And yes, I targeted some of my pet peeves, like celebrity autograph forgers and stinky sluts selling their underwear.
There was enough "cranky" humor that one of the fake ads I put on my blog turned up in the magazine.
And guess what, they actually asked PERMISSION before they used it.
Of course the site is long gone (which is why I "purpled out" the full address...you can't reach it). The "free website" concept ("we make our money with banner ads") failed. You do remember Geocities, don't you? Fortunately, after struggling along year after year, they graciously gave us warning when they decided to pull the plug. We had several months to copy off everything and go move somewhere else, if we felt like paying.
I had a few punny ads promoting eBAYER aspirin. The one the magazine used was on a page devoted to Ebay pests and jerks including those who get more joy out of SNIPING and beating someone else out of the item, than the item itself:
Another ad:
My site, without any help from Big Brother Google, was very popular. People regularly linked to it from their eBay ads and "about me" eBay pages, and it was a topic of conversation on the various eBay message boards. Most loved the site for offering comic truths and salty advice on how to better sell items and have some manners.
Some sellers threatened to SUE me, because I ridiculed their moronic mistakes. As Judy Tenuta used to say: "Come and get me, pigs!" Many would email me with examples of dopey ads they saw: "This would be GREAT for your website." Spelling mistakes were always fun:
Some gag pages had recognition humor:
Some pages were designed to call attention to eBay problems...to "name and shame." Why, it only took another ten years for eBay to decide that, yes, unsanitary auctions should NOT be on the site...and another five years before they put in filters to make SURE some stinkers couldn't post anything dirty. Like...
Mostly, like consumer advocates who appeared on talk shows and news broadcasts, my role was to alert buyers to beware of scams. This included forgeries. People somehow get the idea, even now, that if it's on eBay, it MUST be legit. But no, eBay always admits, "we're JUST a venue," and they have no idea what's forged or not. They rely mostly on VeRO members ("Verified Rights Owner" reps) who will point out counterfeit goods and other fakery. This is fine for SOME things...Louis Vuitton and Gucci and Disney have every reason to knock off the knock-off vendors so people buy the real thing. But most celebrities don't have a VeRO rep, or don't want to pay one to save their fans from buying forgeries. They figure, "let the buyer beware."
Somebody complaining to eBay and saying, "this picture looks like a forgery, do something..." would get, "we're just a venue, contact the celebrity and ask the celebrity to contact us and stop the auction."
Here's one typical outrageous example, and it came not from some weasel forging stuff in his basement, but from a well known autograph dealer who supposedly knew his stuff and could tell a fake. But in this case, didn't:
When the site eventually disappeared and Geocities went under, some people asked me to bring the site back. I suppose, if I was more of an entrepeneur, I could've fashioned a dot.com and become the Ralph Nader of eBay, and PERHAPS got enough banner ads to make it worthwhile, but I was more interested in writing books, doing celeb photography, and knocking off magazine fiction. But...maybe one day you'll see me on "Shark Tank," asking for a million dollars to start that SURE-THING website where people can out dishonest sellers and fume about their frustrations. Only I have a feeling the "Shark Tank" people will say, "Nah, we won't invest. Go put an ad up on eBay, offering to do the site, and see how many bids you get from potential backers!"
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