NEIL SIMON - The only time his timing was off

Neil Simon was a master of comedy timing. The timing of his death; not so much. He's not around to fret over it.

But...dying right after war hero John McCain? With the tributes to the late Senator swelling with praise and welling with tears?

That didn't leave a lot of room for tributes to a mere mild-mannered comedy writer, passing at the riper old age of 91. McCain was 81. Entertainment writers are still shoveling adjectives onto the memory of Aretha Franklin.

Neil Simon was a gentle, soft-spoken man. The time I met him, we talked a bit about comedy and books, and he wryly nodded and agreed that making money writing screenplays was a LOT more lucrative than writing an autobiography (his). He wasn't surprised that six figures advances didn't go to writing books on comedians and comedy (me). He autographed my Samuel French actors' edition of "Prisoner of 2nd Avenue," which was my offbeat choice of favorite Neil Simon favorite play.

Most would go with "The Odd Couple," which fewer and fewer people remember seeing on Broadway with Art Carney as Felix. I sure don't. But the Lemmon-Matthau film is a classic, and so is the Randall-Klugman TV series. That play was so successful, it spawned all-female and all-black versions as well. There was a memorable Broadway revival with Matthew Broderick and Nathan Lane. There are probably productions of it going on right now in cities around the country.

The same would be true of "The Sunshine Boys," which of course became a classic when George Burns (replacing Jack Benny, who had died of pancreatic cancer) teamed with Walter Matthau for the film version. I saw a revival of that one featuring Jack Klugman and Tony Randall. I'm sure there were many interesting star-combinations reviving it over the year. Not too long ago, a straw hat version was performed by Jerry Van Dyke and Tommy Smothers, and in a great twist, Jerry Van Dyke also starred in a version with his older brother Dick Van Dyke.

Unfortunately Neil Simon probably could not have attended the historic Van Dyke brothers' show in California due to his increasing health problems. In the past few years, added to his chronic kidney condition (he'd gotten a transplant) was Alzheimers.

It's been said Neil Simon was the most prolific playwright since Shakespeare, and also, next to Bill, the one most often produced. After all, not too many college theater groups would want to tackle Ibsen or Miller or Williams when they could go for laughs with Neil Simon.

Simon received 17 Tony nominations. A three-time winner, the Neil Simon Theatre was named for him in 1983; a very rare honor for someone still alive at the time. Can you imagine walking by a theater with your name on it? Can you imagine strolling around Broadway and seeing FOUR different theaters where your shows were being performed??

Among Neil's great achievements:

Come Blow Your Horn; Little Me; Barefoot in the Park; The Odd Couple; Sweet Charity; The Star-Spangled Girl; Plaza Suite; Promises, Promises; Last of the Red Hot Lovers; The Gingerbread Lady; The Prisoner of Second Avenue; The Sunshine Boys; The Good Doctor; God's Favorite; California Suite; Chapter Two; They're Playing Our Song; I Ought to Be in Pictures; Brighton Beach Memoirs; Biloxi Blues; Broadway Bound; Rumors; Lost in Yonkers; Jake's Women; The Goodbye Girl and Laughter on the 23rd Floor.

He found time to be Oscar-nominated as well. This includes "After the Fox," "The Heartbreak Kid," "Only When I Laugh," "Max Dugan Returns," and Seems Like Old Times." Simon's standard was so high, that sometimes critics were a bit disappointed when something didn't SEEM to be great. I remember when "Murder By Death" came out. Some critics thought it was a cheap trick (doing a parody of famous detectives) with some easy laughs (Truman Capote's character being named "Lionel Twain.") No, it's now been rightly called a classic, something you can watch over and over. Same with the similar affectionate salute to film crime noir, "The Cheap Detective."

Neil Simon also won the Pulitzer Prize and the Kennedy Center Honor, before those awards became idiot trinkets that anyone playing the Diversity Card could win.

You didn't see Neil Simon slugging it out on the Cavett show with Lillian Hellman or Gore Vidal. He didn't knock out prepared witty remarks when Carson lobbed questions at him, as Johnny did for an Erma Bombeck or Paar did for Selma Diamond. Mostly he preferred to be home writing. Just how "happy" his home was, I have no idea. One can wonder, as he had more wives than Tony awards. Most of his wives lasted ten or twenty years. Given the growth and changes in his life and career, it's not that surprising that some of these relationships faltered. He was married to Joan Baim for 20 years (1953-1973). He had a ten year run with actress Marsha Mason (1973-1983). Elaine Joyce, who was the widow of Bobby Van, married Neil in 1999 and is his widow. You can check the obits for more information on Neil. But maybe he'd prefer if you watched "The Odd Couple" or "The Sunshine Boys" or "Murder By Death" -- for the 10th or 20th time.

I love living. I have some problems with my life, but living is the best thing they've come up with so far." - Neil Simon