IT'S THE PRESIDENTIAL PRIMARIES, CHARLIE BROWN! (Good Grief)

Floyd the Barber meets Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton

They stumped in Mayberry.

They met FLOYD...

Germany: Trade You a Comedian for all those Muslims...

Verrrrry interesting (to quote the comical Nazi played by Arte Johnson on "Laugh-In.")

A story today about The Pope accepting some sad Syrian refugees mentioned that they were stuck on Lesbos (what a straight line). And why?

Because Germany has a new deal with Turkey to return some of the more psychotic and murderous Muslims coming into the country.

Glance over to the side, and note another story about Germany and Turkey in the news: a comedian who joked that Turkey's president watches porn MAY end up in jail for five years.

It seems that Madame Merkel of Germany doesn't want to offend Turkey. Not when Turkey seems to be offering to pull Muslims out of Germany and toss 'em somewhere else. "Hey, Merk, we'll pull 'em out of your pubes and...you don't really want to know WHAT happens to them, do you? Didn't think so."

Just do us a solid, and shut up this dumb cluck comedian who doesn't respect the leader of Turkeys.

There's some murky law Merkel can point to, saying that ever since Germany murdered millions of Jews and tried to take over the world twice, it's time to be sensitive about people who make jokes.

On the plus side, a smug Muslim who was making "jokes" about Jews was given a fine and a minor jail sentence. Well, yeah, you incite hatred of any minority, be it religious or sexual, you get called on it. Smugly saying, "that was a joke" when it wasn't, doesn't get you off the hook.

BUT...joking about any world leader is pretty much fair game. Unless you're saying, "This Turkey guy should be assassinated," and there's not even some kind of punchline (..."by drowning him in cranberry sauce") then it shouldn't be a crime. The comic is doing it from a stage, and from behind the big flashing sign: "COMEDIAN."

Freedom of Speech is being swapped for "we've got too many Muslims, help us get rid of some," a reality show turned deadly.

Got it, Merks. You're throwing a comedian under the bus in order to keep smiling and saying to Turkey: "Take our Muslims. PLEASE!"

Dan Garodnick: Do you understand the words "COPYRIGHT" and "ASSHOLE?"

I was at one of those idiotic "neighborhood association" meetings where Bernie Sanders-types get up and bitch about how traffic lights move too fast. Then a Bernie Sanders in drag-type adds, "It's hard to get a cab!"

Then some nice lady scolds everyone for not being nice, and allowing the patient police officer from the local precinct to read out his list of how many violations were written up for speeding bike riders.

This is followed by the various reps for very busy politicians who give little speeches and hurry away. I did manage to collar Garodnick's stooge before he hurried away. I mentioned the issue of copyright-infringing lunatics in Times Square. Not to mention the old public access porno woman letting it all hang out and the fabulous "Desnudas" all painted up. How about passing a law to get rid of them?

The answer: "It's hard to pass legislation." You'd think that's the reason we elect a councilman, to pass legislation, but I guess not. What Garodnick finally did (let's leave behind a dozen other laws that should be passed, and a dozen more that need to be strengthened) is this:

Huh?

As usual, the Dept. of Transportation, Dept. of Sanitation, Police Department, end up doing a Three Stooges impression, as they toss the hot potato around: "Not ME, NOT me, NOT ME!"

So it's the Department of Transportation, which has no uniformed officers, that is supposed to enforce rules? They're going to tussle with violent, psychotic illegal aliens in super-hero outfits? Grinning whores in paint? Lunatics for whom English isn't even a second language hiding under Dora the Explorer's skirt?

"Cops said they do not plan to use the new rules as an excuse to arrest performers..." Oh, how helpful.

This is all too familiar. Call up the cops, and they say, "Oh, that's Sanitation." Call up Sanitation and they say "Oh, that's DOT." Call up "DOT" and they say "Contact 911." And around it goes.

Dan, the guy in the Spiderman outfit who has been arrested four times is an ASSHOLE. A self-entitled ASSHOLE. He and the rest of his psychos actually believe he has a right to climb into a copyrighted and trademarked outfit, and intimidate tourists.

Apparently Marvel, Disney, Sesame Street and the rest have absolutely no way of protecting their intellectual property. They're supposed to hire lawyers to serve papers on illegal aliens? They're not allowed to confiscate the costumes. As with Internet piracy, they're supposed to just shrug and let the entitled do as they please.

Dan, the answer isn't to try and fence in a bunch of non-English speaking maniacs.

What happened? You were lobbied by the Insane Elmo Squad?

What's wrong with NO unlicensed costumed characters allowed in Times Square or anywhere else? This isn't Halloween. Let Marvel, Disney, Sesame Street etc. get $100 a day from these psychos, and issue licenses. No license? Costume confiscated. Maniac is arrested.

As for the Desnudas (isn't it lovely to live in Nueva York, where almost nobody speaks English anymore), PAINT is not clothing. Nudity doesn't belong on city streets. Beaches? Rooftops? Not Times Square. Whatever became of "disturbing the peace?" Whatever became of "creating a public nuisance?"

It seems pretty obvious that laws CAN be passed, and that if motivated (by a Giuliani or a Bloomberg) the police, the Department of Saniation, our city council and the rest CAN take aggressive action. What we are seeing under Mayor De Lousio, is lame, limp non-leadership that is creating bratty, self-entitled lunatics destroying the "quality of life" in the city. Giuliani was big on the "broken windows" theory. You fix "broken windows" and create a sense of pride in the neighborhood. Well, regarding Times Square, let's fix the crackpots.