It's the day when kids get down to the bottom of the bag, and have to eat the crap they've PUT OFF for SO LONG.
While the adults suffer with such upcoming miseries as the New York Marathon ("Keep going! You're Going GREAT! Woo Hoo!") and the Election ("NOBODY WINS...") the kids stare at dubious creations like "candy corn." They wonder, "is it better to eat lint?"
Yes.
Here's the list, but feel free to recall some hellish concoctions from YOUR past, like Sen-Sen, lilac-scented gum, hard bits of sugar "buttons" on rolls of paper, or nauseating "pixie stix" of pure sugar.
Shaw said "Youth is wasted on the young." Adults seem to know this, and so some of them waste very little money in filling up the trick-or-treat bag with cheap crap.
I must admit that I didn't have such great taste when I was a kid. I discovered at an obscure candy store, run by an old, old woman, packages of "Cherry Humps." Huh? What? I bought one. It was two cherries, "enrobed" in chocolate, and suspended in some kind of white nougat. Yum! It wasn't until many months later, when I bought a pack somewhere else, that I realized the "white nougat" was just liquid syrup gone stale.
No comments:
Post a Comment